Butthurt Report Form

Internet Version

Date and Time you experienced Butthurt

Please Describe the Nature of the Butthurt

LiveJournal Post
Message Board Post
Comment Thread
Blog Post
Random Joke/Cartoon/News Item that you found

Please Tell Us More About the Incidence of Butthurt

Someone made a blog post I didn't agree with.
Someone posted a cartoon or drawing that made me cry.
Someone wrote a story or anecdote that brought up Bad Memories and made me cry.
Someone mucked up the storyline in my RP.
I found out my internet boyfriend/girlfriend is cheating on me using an alias.
Someone posted pornography and it sullied my innocent virgin eyes.
Someone posted pornography and my boss saw it.
I lost an argument in a chat room.
I asked for critique on my writing and got it.

Yes No Were there tears?
Yes No Was there permanent mental scarring from the butthurt?
Yes No Was there lost sleep from the butthurt?
Yes No Did you miss work or arrive late to work because of the butthurt?
Yes No Were you forced to employ a coping mechanism like turning off the computer and going outside for awhile?
Yes No Were there emergency phone calls or text messages?
Yes No Was there any incident of carpal tunnel from typing out long-ass Butthurt Rebuttals?

Please Tell Us More About the Person Who Caused the Butthurt

They are a big mean poopy pants who should be banned from the internet forever or at least until they learn that I am right and superior and they are wrong and should bow down and worship me now.
They deserve to be hunted down like a dog and should be shot down on their front porch.
They and their ilk should be rounded up and herded into concentration camps.
There should be laws to punish people like that.
They should be kicked out of America because we're the home of the free and we don't DO shit like that here.
They should be just as accountable for their actions online as they are in real life and also so I can have access to all of their personal information so I can stalk them.
All of the above.

Did You Take Any Actions Yourself Regarding the Butthurt?

I wrote a six thousand word response detailing the extent of my butthurt and emailed it to them or posted it in their blog coments.
I sent an incomprehensible flame to them from a dummy email account.
I used a spam program to send them multiple flame emails.
I organized a DDoS attack on their server/website.
I got all my bestest friends together and organized a flame war.
I created new emails/LJ accounts for the specific purpose of flaming this person.
I posted this person's RL information everywhere I could think of; they'll get a Molotov cocktail through their window sooner or later and that'll teach them to mess with me.
I realized that arguing on the internet is usually pointless and found something else to do with my time.